A Fresh Start

1 Corinthians 13:4-8

New International Version (NIV)

4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

The Holidays... no, CHRISTmastime was a wonderful, blessed gift, and it flew by in an instant, as it always does.  The "instant" was filled with many mini-instances that will be treasured always.  

As I think back on 2013, I smile a contented smile.  But I also feel frustrated.  Frustrated that I can't possibly condense, highlight, or emphasize just how very many lovely and precious experiences it brought us.  All I can do, all any of us can do, is keep moving forward, trying to be better than before.  We can feel more, do more, pray more, give more, repent more, love more.  We can embrace this as we live each and every moment.

Dearest Ava, Soren, & Gressa:  

It's the start of a new year.  Our world makes a big to-do about resolutions and goals - particularly associated with the beginning of a new year.  What's in store in 2014?  We don't know.  True, the beginning of the new year signifies a natural, new start.  But, my prayer for you, is that not only on January 1st, but on each and every day - you commit yourself to growing as a person, and a child of your Heavenly Father.  He loves you so!  He doesn't promise the days will always be easy, but He DOES promise to always be with you... guiding and protecting you.  This is your comforting truth, always!  Shine for him - let it shine brightly!  Be fearless.  There is nothing... nothing to fear, in Him.

PS.  This is also more FUN. :)

Love, Mama

 I think of all we have yet to accomplish... the have-to's and the want-to's... but then I remember what we already have done.  Gressa has learned all of her addition and subtraction facts; she's reading.  She is learning about punctuation, sentence structure, and she's soaking up what it means to take care of a family, every day, alongside me.  She's gaining an accurate perspective on the world around her.  She loves to cook and bake, and I'm so thankful for this time together in the kitchen.

Soren has mastered his multiplication facts, isn't fazed by long division or fractions, and has blooming reading comprehension and a developing interest in story writing. He's learned to follow his curiosity, whenever it strikes, and he's busy learning what's going to make him a fabulous husband and daddy one day, if he chooses that.

Ava's rate of growth and maturity is flying right off of the charts... she's starting to wash her face, clean off her desk, and make her bed (consistently, and with effort) - without being told to do so!  These transformations are a true epiphany in the idea of "planting with the harvest in mind".  Recently, she told me that she might want to homeschool through high school. Now, that's never been the plan exactly, with our (hers and ours) sights set on FVL... but it was startling and amazing to hear her reasoning.  She really needed to step outside of her peer culture to see the big picture, and to realize what she needed to do for herself.  "Mom.  I really want to do well in school, and in college, the best I can... so I can get a good job that I like.  I think I want to be a Pediatrician!"  Heart melts.  She is coming into her own. What else could a mama ask for?

So, while it's tempting to let The Evil One convince me that we need to keep "on pace"; we need to "do more", I plan to keep on truly enjoying my moments and days with the ones given to me.  We'll do work, to be sure!  But we'll also do love.  And grace.  And forgiveness.  And more love.  And it doesn't hurt to remind myself what we HAVE done... Exhibit A, below: Soren's cummulative math lessons for the year, so far.  

We started "back to school" today (Thursday), as Tony was back to work... and... why not??  They seemed ok with getting started back up :)  We were also able to finish up the last few chapters of our read aloud, "Everything on a Waffle".  

Math time

After lunch, it was off to the Building for Kids Museum :)  Thanks to Papa, for the membership for the kids' Christmas gift!

 In other news, the begging for rodents hasn't let up at ALL in this house....

To be completely honest... I.Am.Tired.  I'm happy-tired... but I am plenty tired. 

Still... I feel the sand falling faster and faster through the hourglass of childhood with every lost tooth, every giggle that matures just a little each time it escapes, and with every pair of shoes that's suddenly a little too tight.  

This sand that waits for no one, not even tired mamas... it makes me want to scribble down every moment.  It urges me to record every conversation, impromptu dance routine (think sisters doing the Tango), every game of horse or pig, and each puppet show.

But if I am to soak up these gifted moments alongside these precious gems of mine, I simply can't.  I can't BE THERE and also be an "outsider" on the sidelines, trying to record the show.  No, subtlety is a somewhat-lonely must, and the commitment any parent understands; it helps me stay focused on being in the here and now.  No other earthly thing could ever grab hold of my heart, making such pure and real things so very clear.  And for that, I am eternally grateful.  

Plus - when I read a "Topic of Choice" journal entry such as this one - at night, in my weariness, it sure adds to the entertainment of this crazy ride (and also makes me reconsider topic-of-choice journaling..)!

And so, yes, in the midst of fatigue and sometimes mental exhaustion... fuel siphons out of me more quickly than the coffee goes in, and yet I try my best to serve my family on an ongoing, relentless basis... and I wouldn't want it ANY other way.  Mamas?! 

Thank you Lord, for my precious family.  Please never let me take their miraculous in You for granted.  Amen.